My Wildlife in Montana: True Bear Stories

I have lived in bear country for over twelve years now and I have some favorite, true stories about bears. Bears can be quite funny when they aren't scaring the pants off everyone, so without further ado, here's the first one...

One of my two restaurants is located in a resort lodge. In the summer, the whole area around the hotel lodge is teaming with wildlife. One night, a friendly couple that had dined with us earlier that evening, returned to the lodge looking bemused and befuddled. I asked what had happened.

They explained that they had left a window open in their mountain home when they came to the restaurant for dinner. When they returned home, they could see movement inside the house by the light of the car's headlamps. They watched helplessly as a large black bear ransacked the house looking for food.

They also watched while this bear climbed out through the window, squatted in the bushes to relieve himself, and then climbed back into the house to continue his foray. Really!

The couple gave up and returned to the lodge to relay their story. At least there was one less mess for them to clean up when it was all said and done. Rather polite of the bear, don't you think?

Another couple, Ted and Dottie, were dining with us and they also left their window open. The weather was beautiful and really, what were the chances that a bear would just happen along during those few hours that they were out, right? Wrong, sure enough they returned home to find their kitchen in disarray (and their dog cowering under the bed.)

A bear had gone through the refrigerator, freezer and pantry, eating almost everything in his path...almost everything . Now, you should know that Dotty considers herself to be a pretty decent cook and I would wholeheartedly agree. I have never had a bad meal at Dottie's house. Dottie had made a lasagna earlier that day but had left it in the refrigerator, opting to dine out instead.

You guessed it, that bear did not touch Dottie's lasagna. He ate every darn thing in their kitchen except that lasagna, which he uncovered but then left alone. Dottie was so insulted! I think she was more ruffled about her lasagna being rejected than the rest of the evening's calamities.

A woman defends her dog from a 200-pound bear using a giant zucchini, only in Montana! I love this true story.

The woman had let her 12-year-old dog out for his evening "break." The dog was suddenly attacked by a bear, which likely had been attracted to an apple tree in the woman's backyard. Instinctively, she kicked at the bear to save the dog; the bear turned its full attention to her in response.

As she backed quickly into her house and tried to close the door, the bear pursued her and stuck its head through the doorway. Terrified, the woman grabbed the first thing she could, which was a 14 pound zucchini from her garden, and bopped the bear on the head with it. The bear fled.

Both the woman and her dog were OK, but I don't think the same could be said for the zucchini.